"My wife didn’t want to take maternity pictures, so I hired a photographer and took her place…" [x]
I didn’t know that Miley Cyrus was a brony
man i dont even remember the first three years of my life. ha ha mustve been hella baked
Lana Del Rey being cute for “Vogue”
"WE ARE SEX BOB-OMB AND WE’RE HERE TO MAKE YOU THINK ABOUT DEATH AND GET SAD AND STUFF"
"I had a crush on you in high school."
"The assignment is due tomorrow, not today."
"The assignment is due today, not tomorrow."
"Wait, before you get comfortable, can you-"
"Can I see your laptop for a minute?"
"i know you wanna go out tonight, but i need you to babysit"
The first one